


Now

by imnotstraightmom



Category: Carmilla (Web Series), Carmilla - All Media Types, Carmilla - J. Sheridan Le Fanu
Genre: Awkward Romance, Badass Carmilla, Emotional Carmilla, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, F/M, Tiny Gay Laura Hollis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-05
Updated: 2016-01-28
Packaged: 2018-05-05 01:58:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5356715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imnotstraightmom/pseuds/imnotstraightmom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carmilla is well known at school for her violent acts and other behavior. But all of that is coming now to bite her in the butt. Relationship problems, family problems, abuse, drug abuse, and so much more. I don't think Carmilla is going to get a break soon, what do you think?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is imnotstraightmom.tumblr.com
> 
> Feel free to message me or contact me through there, because I actually reply on Tumblr.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> '**' indicates same day but different time.

**_Then_ **

 

_The thing is, most people don’t understand what others go through, the things they do, the things they put up with, or who they are._

_The reason for it, is well because they choose not to understand._

_They choose not to listen, not to care,_

_So they leave._

_But when they are in need of a shoulder to cry on and vent too,_

_That’s the only time when they're around you._

 

 

My life as of this moment, is shit. There are still times where I wonder why I'm still alive and still existing, because there were so many times that I knew I should have been dead. I've done a lot of things that I don't regret, and some that I do greatly. The one thing that sucks about life in general is that people view you of the mistakes that you have done, either viewing you as a disappointment or some sort of fucked up person that is looked down upon on.

But in this case, I am a fuck up and a disappointment, and there's no changing that.

And that is entirely my fault, and no one else's.

The only one who there is to blame, is me.

 

 

 

 

"Get the hell out!" he slammed his stapler onto his metal desk, knocking over his plaque that had his name engraved on it. He stood up and pointed directly at the door of his office, his hand noticeably shaking with anger. "You're expelled! You're fucking expelled! You can bet your sorry ass that I and everyone else on this campus wont ever be seeing you ever again!" was the last thing I remembered hearing my pissy ass principal yell right after I got up and walked out of his office.

 

I felt a vibration near my face, it was morning. The air felt nice and cool, but not enough to make it a day to wear warm comfortable clothing. I could tell it would be warm later on in the day because of the warm sun light that was hitting my face through the white blinds I had on my window, and because my face felt overly hot. I slightly opened one of my eyes a bit, and yeah it was morning alright.

 

I don't know what I did in my dream, but I'm sure it must have been pretty huge if I were to get expelled. Normally, I just get suspended.

 

I woke up with a killer headache that was pounding, making my head throb like hell, I honestly don’t remember going out last night. I tried rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, stared up at the frost-like ceiling for a moment debating whether or not I should get my ass up. I sat up on the edge of the bed, and then attempted to get up but ended up losing my balance stumbling back onto the bed. Fuck, how fucked up was I yesterday? I looked to the right at my computer desk that had several books on it, along with some scattered pencils that were on my dismantled keyboard, then looking over to my digital clock.

 

Its 8:45 A.M.

 

I got up from my bed running around my messy room, rummaging through my drawers for some clean clothes I could wear for the day, which didn't matter because I always looked like shit. I removed the clothes that I was wearing, and changed into a T-Shirt and some black skinny jeans. I looked like I went through hell when I was looking at myself in the mirror, I had bags underneath my eyes, my hair was a mess, I looked like I haven't slept in days. Jesus Christ, I looked like a tweaked. I ran my fingers through my hair, hoping it would at least make my hair look nice, even though it looked like I had multiple sex sessions through out the night.

 

"Hey.." the voice startling me a bit. It was dad, he had peeked inside door, his eyes not on me, but on the floor.

 

"Yeah?" I said, he looked worried.

 

"Come into the living room, we need to talk." He barely managed to mumble before walking away.

 

This can't be good, especially if he's here. He's never here.

 

I looked back into the mirror, staring at my reflection, what the hell did I do now?

 

I walked out of my room and into the white carpeted living room, where I saw Mother sitting on the dark gray sofa that was closest to me with a stern face, staring at the floor. Whereas my dad was on the armchair that was on the other side of the room he was staring at me with his arms crossed, showing his veins on them that popped out.

 

Minutes passed before she said anything.

 

"Center now." Mother commanded.

 

This isn't going to end well.

 

I stood in the center of the room, I didn't know why exactly I was going to be punished for, I've done a lot of things, but I just didn't know what they knew or what I did in fact. Did they even know anything?

 

She stood up, and looked down for a moment and shook her head in disapproval, and looked back up at me, smiling, grinning, she lifted her arms and she began, applauding. She was applauding? but the applauding became slower.

 

"Congratulations, Coonngraattttuuulaaattioooonnssssssss!!" Her voice grew louder, angrier, still applauding, "YOU EMBARRASSED YOURSELF. No wait, not only yourself, but your FATHER AND I!" The applauding stopped, I looked over at dad and he was still staring at me, his face unchanged with the same expression.

 

"What the hell am I supposed to do with a disgrace like you?!" She came closer, she was now towering over me.

 

"HOW ON EARTH DO YOU GET YOURSELF EXPELLED AND ARRESTED WHEN YOU JUST CAME BACK?!!!"

 

Expelled?

 

"Wai- what?" I looked up at her, confused. What did she mean expelled?

 

Arrested?...

 

"Don't pretend you don't know. What did that poor girl do to you??????" I looked down at her hands, they're fists now.

 

"Get that fucking look off of your face right now," her fists were now trembling, I kept looking down at her hands and back up at her, "Don't fucking tell me that you were high again."

 

"I-I don't…" I could even barely hear myself respond, what the hell happened? What did I do now? I-I don't remember shit…

 

She laughed, rubbing her forehead with one of her hands, "First you get kicked out and then transferred to another school because your pathetic worthless self was caught under the influence of alcohol," she shook her head, her hair swaying back and forth. "And, not even a month later you come back to the same school, you get expelled and arrested? Over what? A fucking girl? Just because she intimidated you?"

 

Then it hit me, well she hit me actually.

 

The next thing I knew was that I was on the floor with her punching me and slapping me across the face.

 

How the hell did I get expelled? What did I do? What girl? What the fuck did I do now??

 

Oh no, the dream. Or so I thought it was dream… I got into a fight again…

 

I then felt a stabbing pain on my stomach, I was knocked the air out of me, she had kicked me, I clung to my stomach, I couldn't breathe, my eyes were watery, my face was throbbing, wet and hot. She was still towering over me, her expression now with disapproval.

 

"I don't know how you continue being such a disappointment to the Karnstein name," I felt another kick to the stomach, the room echoed with my coughing and groans,  my face was overly hot and wet. She had walked away, I listened to her footsteps disappear as she went up the stairs.

 

"For now, try not to get into any more… problems dear, because I can promise you that you will hear from me again, and I will find out everything." A door slammed shut.

 

I tried getting up, but to no avail, I fell right on my face that was sore and that I’m now sure will be bruised tomorrow. I felt some warm hands on my shoulders.

 

"Cmon, let's get you to your room." He whispered, I looked up at him, he looked so disappointed and ashamed in me. I just recently had my shit together.

 

He helped me get up, we walked slow, taking our time to reach my room. He then opened the door for me, then helped me to get to my bed, laying me down.

 

"Try not to piss her off anymore, kiddo." he managed to say after he was just staring at me with nothing but silence.

 

I felt like I was choking up, my face hotter and my face now wetter, "I am so sorry" I ended up saying between sobs.

 

"Sorry isn't enough, you know that. A-and you were doing so good and and now this…?" his eyes burned through mine, because I knew he was right.

 

"I know." Was all I could say.

 

He sighed, scratching his bald head, "Later we will discuss this without your mom, just," he hesitated, "be ready later in the afternoon, because we have to pick up your stuff from school."

 

"Okay…" He got up from my bed without looking back at me, and left me alone in my room.

 

Shit. I buried my face into one of my pillows, allowing myself to break right then and there. Not again. I was doing so good.

 

 Or so I thought.

 

**

 

I was brought back  with the sound of a buzz from spacing out and staring at the white plain wall in front of me. I don't know how long I was spacing out and just laying there alone with myself.

 

Another buzz, the vibration coming from the floor. I sat up to look down from the side of my bed, picking up my phone that had the screen lit up.

 

**_**New Message(s)**_ **

****

**_**12 Missed Calls**_ **

 

I slid my thumb on the lower part of the phone screen, unlocking it and went straight to the Messages application.

 

_**LaF (31 Messages)** _

__

_**Mattie (10 Messages)** _

__

_**Willy Poo (1 Message)** _

 

Goddamnit, what exactly did I do?

 

I looked through all the messages I had received, LaF wondering if i'm okay, Mattie freaking out asking what happened, and of course Will, calling me an utter fool and fuck up for fucking up so badly again.

 

I literally just got my shit together, how could I fuck up so badly and oh so quickly?

 

 

 

 

"Want me to go with you?" my dad asked once we met up with the security at my school, well now old school I should say.

 

"Uh, no I'm okay, I can go alone." I looked up at him, he was worried and I knew he wanted to say something else but was holding back.

 

"Okay." He nodded, and I walked away with a security guard that had to follow me in case of anything.

 

The worst thing about getting expelled and having to go back to meet with your principal to fill out the paperwork to make it official, is going back, when everyone is at lunch. Which means I have to see everyone that I absolutely hate, and everyone that hates me.

 

In order for me to retrieve to my things from my gym locker was to go to the other side of the school and go through the lunch area where everyone is at, and that means having to see everyones shitty ass faces, and hear everyone talk shit about you as you walk by. Like I already don’t hear enough of that at home.

 

 We now arrived at the lunch area of the school, I did my best to not look noticeable by keeping my head down at all times, but that’s just impossible when you have security right by your side. I mean, hes a real nice guy and all, I've talked to him a couple times since I always got in trouble, but if security is following you then you did something and everyone knows that here.

 

"Keep your head down and don't look at anyone okay? We want to get through this quick without any problems either okay?" He patted my shoulder and I'm sure he also felt all the tension once we began walking through the lunch tables.

 

People's voices were now turning to whispers as we walk by them, it began getting quieter and quieter with each couple steps we took. I kept staring down at my black combat boots move, trying my best to ignore all the whispers around me.

 

_Why the fuck is she here?_

_Isn't she supposed to be in jail or some shit?_

_Why doesn't she just die already?_

_Didn't she get caught with weed?_

_No. I hear she got into a fight again._

_What a bitch._

_Why don't they kick her out already?_

_I hope she never comes back._

_Fucking druggie._

_I hope she never comes back._

 

 

The whispers became louder, it felt like they were shouting at me, everyones whispers were now surrounding me.

 

"Hey, hey were inside now…" the guard was in front of me, my cheeks were wet and my face was hot and I didn't even realize I was crying and that we were inside now. The building is one of the oldest structures of the school, the walls were white… well used to be,  some areas turning to a faded yellow, others parts were just dirty as fuck, the shelves that had trophies on them were covered in dust, it was a bit dark, and one of the lights kept flickering. "Take some to collect yourself," the guard patted my back as he walked ahead of me and sat down on the stairs that were near the Girl's Locker Room. I wiped the tears from my face and headed to the locker room, and as I was opening the doors of it, I told him I'd be back.

 

The Girl's Locker Room was most likely the nastiest place on the entire campus site. The lockers were covered in spray paints, random taggings, people's names, a bunch of slurs that mostly consisted of "bitch" and the word "slut." There were also rats and roaches, even the lockers that have locks on them get rats inside, I've no clue how but those fuckers are sneaky. Want to know the worst part of it all? Bloody tampons and pads. If someone hated you so much, they would either put theirs or someone elses bloody pad/tampon right on your locker. They make sure it was fresh too. If someone wanted to film a prison scene or some shit, this would be the perfect for such a scene.

 

I didn't have much in my locker, just my gym clothes, some sneakers, money, and some extra clothes whenever Mother kicked me out, which was very frequently. I opened up my locker and I saw something fall to the disgusting floor at the corner of my eye. I bent down and picked up the small green sticky post-it note that had fallen, thank god it wasn't a roach. I unfolded the note and began reading it:

 

_You need to get ahold of yourself dude,_

_Am I ever going to see my bestfriend again? :(_

_\- Laf_

 

 

I felt my eyes water, I stared at the note for a long time, because even I don't know the answer to that. I started to take my things out of the locker furiously, I shoved everything inside the bag that I was given by one of the other guards. I slammed the locker shut, making the handle fall off, fucking cheap ass school. I picked up the handle and threw it somewhere, somewhere that had glass because I heard glass shatter but I was too furious at myself to care,

 

Because I don't know what's going to happen to me now.

 

After getting all my shit back from my two lockers that I had on campus, we went straight to the assistant principal's office, he was big guy, like really big. He had gray hair and a gray moustache that made him look like a walrus. Atleast, that’s the reason why everyone calls him a walrus. He was really nice about everything even though I had apparently assaulted this one girl who I could not tolerate. I had to sign some papers that said that I had to cooperate with the school and city since the school and the girl's family are pressing charges against me. In all honesty I was doing everyone a favor, everyone hated her because she was full of shit and annoying as fuck, they should be thanking me instead.

 

The drive back home was quiet, my dad didn't say a word once we left the school. I knew he was disappointed, he didn't have to tell me, it was written all over his face. The car stopped, we were now in the drive way of my house, and my dad was just staring at the steering wheel.

 

"I'm going to the store, so you can go ahead and head inside, okay?"

 

I nodded and got out of the car with the things I had from school, I turned towards the house, and my dad yells my name.

 

"Yeah dad?"

 

"Just know that I love you," there was tears running down his cheeks, "I always will no matter what alright?" He voice broke a bit, it hurt him to say that.

 

"I love you too dad," I was now crying too.

 

He gave me a smile, one of his reassuring sincere smiles that made me feel like everything would be okay in the end, and it felt like it would.

 

I watched him drive away in his gray 4 seater car, I knew I was going to be home alone for the rest of the day, so I decided to just lock myself in my room for the remainder of the day and to keep away from any human interaction.

 

Everything's going to be okay.

 

**

 

"Wake up!" I felt ice cold water all over my face and body, because that was exactly what I was woken up with. Mother was obviously furious but was shaking and holding a bucket that still had some chips in it, my body was shivering and wet and I have no clue as to what the hell was going on. It was raining hard as hell, the leaves on the tree outside my window were drenched and my window was open all last night which made my shivering worse because it was allowing all the cold air to come in.

 

"It's all your fucking fault, what a coward…" she threw an envelope at me and stormed out of my room and slammed the door shut.

 

I opened the envelope and pulled out the letter that was in it, it was made by my dad, I knew that instantly because of his and my own handwriting, its so similar:

 

_To my daughter,_

_I don't know what I did to raise such a child who turned out to be someone who is selfish and doesn't care about her own family who gave everything to her. I don't know if it was because I was a horrible father and didn't raise you well, but all I know is that I messed up somewhere...  I don't know if you even appreciate the sacrifices your mother and I have made for you, but I am not going to stay here and watch you ruin your life anymore. I'm leaving. I love you both dearly, but I can't watch my own daughter throw her life away because she keeps making foolish mistakes. I just can't and it hurts me to say this, but I'd rather leave than be there for my daughter. Right now, you're on your own kid. And if you don't get it together, you'll end up miserable. I've always wanted to watch you grow up and get married, but at this moment I really don't think you will even get that far, I'm just, I'm utterly disappointed in you. I do hope to see you one day prove me wrong, by becoming successful or even by just graduating high school atleast, I just, I really hope you prove me wrong C, I love you but this is too much. I'm sorry I'm not the father you deserve or was the father you even wanted. But I failed you, and I don't want to fail you even more._

_I love you Carmilla._

_But I can't keep failing you anymore,_

_Dad_

 

 

I never knew that yesterday would be the last time I would ever see him again.

Tears were now running down my faces, I was sobbing, and I couldn't breathe anymore.

 

I'm such a fucking disappointment.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are segments of this story, 'Then,' 'Before,' 'After,' and 'Now.'  
> Each segment has an event that has happened to Carmilla.  
> I will go more in depth of the segments as the story progresses and how Carmilla progresses.
> 
>  
> 
> My tumblr is imnotstraightmom.tumblr.com if you would like to ask questions about the story and the characters or for anything. Feel free to message me, thank you!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hadn't updated in a long while due to a family crisis, so I'm sorry, I will now try to post every week.
> 
> '**' indicates same day but different time.

 

_**Then** _

 

" _Come on_ , hurry the fuck up were going to be late!"

 

"Who gives a fuck were only going to be here for 3 hours, it's not like were going to miss anything important?"

 

Betty stopped walking and quickly turned around and looked straight at me. She doesn't say anything for a while.

 

She exhales, "I only want to be on time because I  actually give a shit about getting the hell out of there." She pointed at the direction where we were going. "I don't know about you but I sure as fuck don't want to be like those fucking losers who will either stay there for the rest of high school or become a fucking drop out." She grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me with her and she was now dragging me, _which really fucking hurt._

" _OW._ DUDE WHAT THEE FUCK."

 

"I'm not letting you become one of _those_ people either, even if I have to drag your ass there every fucking morning."

 

Betty and I have been pretty good friends for as long as I can remember. We've known each other since 4th grade where we would fuck around and cause shenanigans for our teachers. She's really a bright student, when she wants to be of course; like I know she could have all A's and shit if she really were to try, but she's kind of… _lazy_. She could really be one of those star students or whatever if she had the motivation, but she barely tries. She really shouldn't be coming here... The only reason why were going to a continuation school now is because we both got expelled together for beating some chick up. I still don't really remember what exactly happened, but it was bad, to the point where we both got arrested. So now were on probation, _fucking great right?_

 

We arrived at the school, which seriously didn’t look much like a school, more like a liquor store. Theres a gasoline station right next door and theres a couple of hobos hanging out on the side of the beige building, a giant glass window in front with some ugly gray curtains blocking the view so you cant see the inside and the entrance door is glass with the bottom part of it cracked. How could this dump be a school? It looks like a freaking rehab that went to shit... I'm really not looking forward to this, the only people who come here are complete fuck ups and drop outs. _Guess that’s what I am now then._

 

"Looks… Uh _nice_." Betty says without the smallest hint of excitement.

 

"Yeah looks _beautiful_ , I would so bring my girlfriend here on a date!"

 

"Shut up, lets just go in already." She rolled her eyes at me and we both headed for the door.

 

The ghetto door had a white piece of paper taped on it;

 

**'IF YOU R A nEW STUDENT PLEES COME IN'**

 

The writing looked like it was handwritten by a 3 year old with bright red marker, who obviously was beginning how to sound out words to spell them out.

 

_Fucking shit._

 

Betty and I walked into the building and headed the for the first door that was in the bright hallway. The hallway consisted of 3 doors, two classrooms I'm guessing and at the very end of the hall marked by a triangular sign on it read "RESTROOM." We opened the first door and walked inside, and the room was filled with shelves that were either half full or less than half way filled with books. The books seemed to be either elementary school leveled books or middle school, which was way too easy to read. For me atleast. The more I looked around the room, it seemed that the room was fairly empty. Especially since there was 3 rows of desks and only 5 seats were taken out of the 15 desks there are in the room. There was a teacher's desk in the corner of the room that was piled with papers and folders on it, and above the desk was a giant framed photo of a shark with its mouth wide open revealing the rows of teeth it had. Betty looked at me and I just shrugged now heading towards the front of the room. Betty and I sat down at the front, sitting in front of a kid who obviously had some weed on him and some girl who was sleeping soundly. Not as bad as I thought it would be, it seems as if everyone in the room doesn't know what to do, other to just sit in their seats quietly. So I took out my phone since the teacher or whoever is in charge hasn't arrived;

  

**_**New Message(s)**_ **

****

**_LaF (8 Messages)_ **

****

**_P (1 Messages)_ **

****

**_**1 New Facebook Message**_ **

 

Ew, _Facebook_? I don't really use Facebook or get anything on it really, even though I have over a thousand friends or something like that, but I occasionally post a status or maybe upload the casual selfie once in a while but other than that I'm usually offline on it.

 

I'll just reply to my messages afterschool, since they don't seem _that_ important anyhow.

 

I locked my phone and put it inside my sweater pocket, and layed back into my seat.

 

This is going to be the longest 3 hours of my life.

 

**

 

"How was your first day of school? How did it go?"

 

My probation officer is a bit of bitch, but I have to see her weekly so she can do regular check ups on me to make sure I'm doing good in the stupid school so I can leave and be done with my probation as well. Sometimes she's not so bad like today. She's Samoan, she has a bitch face, very very strict, kinda on the chubby side, and she's only really bitchy if you get on her bad side or when she doesn't like you, atleast that's what I noted.  

 

"It was okay, I was in a class filled with idiots. Nothing different than regular school."

 

"You know you are also one of those idiots that youre talking about right? You got _yourself_ sent there so now I have to keep my eye on you."

 

My probation officer was _right_ , I did get myself sent there so I really cant be judgmental towards my classmates, even if they are really fucking stupid.

 

"Look, if you want to leave there and go back to regular school, you need to get your shit together, no more partying, no more skipping class, no more drugs, do your homework, be respectful, have a good attitude, just be a good kid from now on, and in no time you can finish your probation and that dumb school."

 

"Yeah I know, I _just_ \- I don't know, like I fucked up, I fucked up bad and I know that... but can I just go to a different school? A regular one? Instead of this piece of shit of a place??? When I'm in there I feel worse than I already do."

 

"Carmilla, I can't do that for you, you got yourself removed from the school district and in your contract it _states_ that you can not return to any school district until your expulsion is over, which means the completion of that school and your probation with me."

 

I internally slapped myself in the face. I completely forgot that part...

 

"So until then, suck it up and just get through it and don't do anymore stupid crap alright? And if you need anything you have my number and e-mail."

 

"Are we done here?" I got up pushing my chair back behind me.

 

"Yeah, you can leave now... see you next week alright?" She layed back in her desk chair folding her hands in her lap, staring right into me.

 

"Thanks," I said right before I exited her office.

 

 _"For fucking nothing…_ "

 

 

**

 

I hadn't check my phone since I looked at it before class had started this morning, and since I have nothing to do and I'm home alone, I might as well text or watch a stupid YouTube video to end my day. I entered my disgusting room, that had even more clothes being piled up all over, I don't even think I have clean clothes at the moment, god I really need to wash my clothes and clean up all this filth. I'll probably end up putting it off once again, but it's really starting to bug me now. I pushed off the clothes that were on my bed onto the floor, and layed down on my bed, god I missed my bed all day, all I wanted to do was sleep. I took out my phone and swiped the screen to unlock it;

****

**_**New Messages**_ **

****

**_LaF (10 Messages)_ **

****

**_P (3 Messages)_ **

****

**_Willy Poo (1 Message)_ **

****

**_M (1 Message)_ **

 

**LaF (7:12 A.M.): YOUR ASS BETTER BE AWAAKE, YA GOT CLASS**

**LaF (7:12 A.M.): Good luck at your new school dude!!**

**LaF (7:12 A.M.): NO FIGHTING**

**LaF (7:13 A.M.): I REPEAT NO FIGHTING**

**LaF (7:14 A.M.): Please be nice okay? I don't need my best friend getting sent to juvy**

**LaF (7:16 A.M.): Why arent you replying ;/**

**P (7:16 A.M.): Good luck at your new school! Xx and please be good!!!! <3**

**LaF (7:17 A.M.): FINE IGNORE ME THEN ASSHOLE**

**LaF (7:18 A.M.): Just be nice alright?**

**M (12:03 P.M.): Remember you have to meet with your Probation officer, don't be late.**

**Will Poo (1:50 P.M.): I'm going out tonight, can you leave a window unlocked for me?**

**P (2:01 P.M.):  Hey!!**

**P (2:01 P.M.): How was your first day of school?!!!**

**LaF (2:25 P.M.): Did you kill anyone today?**

 

**LaF (2:37 P.M.): Stop!! Ignoring!! Me!!**

 

Exactly what I expected, I really should reply to LaF and Perry or theyre both going to have a heart attack or something. Especially since I haven't replied at all today.

 

 

**Me (3:05 P.M.): Why are you so annoying… School was ok, and  I had to meet my P.O. right after remember?**

**LaF (3:07 P.M.): Oh shit yeah ! Sorry you didn't reply all day and I'm lonely with out you ;/**

**Me (3:07 P.M.): I know I'm sorry**

 

LaF is a bit of a loner, they don't hang out with anyone unless it's me or they just hang out at the Chem. Lab with Mr. Rian, because they love blowing shit up and making messes and all that stuff. But I feel bad because now they're going to be more alone since I'm not there whatsoever…

 

**Me (3:12 P.M.) Sorry Perry I was just busy today, but my day was alright, thanks for asking.**

 

Perry, well Perry has friends she can actually hang out with and all that. They usually do community service for 'fun' and help out other students around school. So I'll probably ask her to befriend LaF since I won't be back for a long while now. Possibly the rest of year, so I'll ask her if she can hang out with them whenever she can once she replies back.

 

I still had a notification that I haven't yet checked, which I might as well check now since I'm not doing anything.

 

**_**2 New Facebook Messages**_ **

 

**Laura H. (7:20 A.M.): Hey.**

**Laura H. (1:15 P.M.): I heard what had happened. Why didn't you tell me anything Carm? Why? I know you're going to read these so please respond… I know we haven't spoken in so long... but just reply to me.**

I sat up on my bed, and stared at my phone for who knows how long, but I was in shock. Did I really just receive a message from Laura Hollis? _Laura_ _Hollis_? No I'm just imagining things now. Wait, _who_ told her? How does _she_ know? This doesn't make sense because… I haven't heard from Laura in over _2 years_. As if she just fell off the face of this Earth and just _poof_ , vanished. She was the biggest part of my life, we were inseparable, she was my other half, my bestfriend… She ended up moving away and went to some other school, and we just lost communication I guess? I actually don't know what had happened. She didn't even say _goodbye_ or anything… She left like nothing and just fucking disappeared and the last thing I remembered from the last time I spoke to her, was that her mother had passed away. That is all I can remember and she just disappeared from my life right after. She was crying the _very very last_ time I talked to her, she was crying _hysterically_ and I just- _I just didn't care…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are segments of this story, 'Then,' 'Before,' 'After,' and 'Now.'  
> Each segment has an event that has happened to Carmilla.  
> I will go more in depth of the segments as the story progresses and how Carmilla progresses.
> 
>  
> 
> My tumblr is imnotstraightmom.tumblr.com if you would like to ask questions about the story and the characters or for anything. Feel free to message me, thank you!

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is imnotstraightmom.tumblr.com
> 
> Feel free to message me or contact me through there, because I actually reply on Tumblr.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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